Poxy plastic packaging

No, nothing to do with leaving the excess & unneccessary food packaging at the supermarket till (Although it's a good and effective direct method of getting the point across - not that I could personally be arsed to spend 5 minutes extra at the end of the checkout unwrapping stuff, thedacs have their shopping/packing system down to a finely tuned machine that gets us out of their as soon as possible*) but a related problem that i'm having at the moment.

I ordered in some stationary bits yesterday and half the stuff has arrived, including three cheapo clipboards. Problem is, these clipboards are shrinkwrapped with plastic so tightly that I can't get the fuckers off. There are no scissors in the entire office and my nails are short (None of those disgustingly long, thick and jagged nails some foul men sport for thedacs) so I can't rip the plastic off. Over the past few years my teeth have slightly moved position so that they no longer meet anywhere which makes using teeth to rip open packets and stuff is something I can no longer do. I don't think you understand how frustrating it is to longer be able to rip sellotape off - I should be getting some form of Disability Benefit you know.

Anyway, these three fucking clipboards are just staring back at me as they suffocate in plastic and I can't help them. How unneccessary! How wasteful! How the fuck has shrinkwrapped clipboards become the most important challenge to my day!

*Side note, thedacs have abandoned the weekly shop at Tesco and reverted back to Morrisons. Aside from not being sure if Tesco was actually more expensive, the experience of shopping there was horrible because it was cramped, felt dowdy and, quite honestly, was filled with the dregs of society. But that's Bletchley for you. Morrisons is newer, on the west flank of the city so more affluent surroundings and geneerally just a better shopping experience on a Saturday.